Round Table

Joy and sorrow are infinitely connected. The roller coaster of life. You rarely have one without the other because to experience one, you must have experienced the opposite by which to measure.This week I experienced both in three short days.

My Aunt Margaret's memorial was last Thursday. Several of us had come from "away"...Texas, Arkansas, and Kentucky, the rest, firmly rooted in the hard granite of Maine. Ben and I hadn't seen some of our relatives in years...since he was a small child. He's now a man.

 With a wee bit of trepidation we gathered at the grave site, unwittingly and informally forming a circle of relatives. I was reminded of the circle of life. Margaret was the first in the family of her generation to die. Young by today's standards, she was 66.

Many of us spoke of our memories of Margaret and her place in the history of our family; bringing to life others who had lived many, many years before. Somehow the passing of one person brings to life those long dead. Funny stories, touching moments, notes of importance and human frailties come to mind as the faces of those we have loved dance before us in a parade of continuity bringing meaning to this sometimes confusing whirl we call life.

The next day my mother, son and I went to my favorite spot on earth...Popham Beach. Three generations who rarely take time out of busy days to wrap their arms around each other and embrace the connection between us, the laughter that knows no boundaries, and the beauty of a place that is as vital to me as my own heart. Warm sand,  soft slap of waves, stingingly cold Atlantic, startling calls of seagulls, and the laughter of those I love will be painted forever in my memory as a treasure.

Later at Maxwells, a dinner gathering of the ladies of the family, plus one very understanding and tolerant young man! My only complaint brings me back to the informal circle of family. When we gather, we need a round table. The long, rectangular table may be fine for gatherings of co-workers or club members, but for a family to be connected in voice, laughter and dreams, a round table is called for. I vote for the round table next time as there is no beginning and no end to our connection to those we love, and besides, it's easier to talk to everyone!

The next day...the drive to Boston to catch a plane back to KY. In true form, Ben and I tortured each other all the way...jesting and posturing just to aggravate each other. Somehow it's easier to leave a place if we distract ourselves. We shared a burger and fries before the flight and jokingly continued the torture until we drove in the driveway here at the house. He was off to a gathering of friends (aka party) and I was off to savor my new memories in peace and quiet.